Having to spend about a month with parents during lockdown didn’t sound exciting to many teenagers out there. The ‘generation-gap’ as we like to address the wall separating parents and teenagers often narrows down the beautiful relationship into a tedious and complicated one.
Silence and a forced smile becomes the only communication. Things get pretty hard with time. We fail to acknowledge and appreciate the effort they took to understand us and help us fulfill our dreams. Dr. Jag from Dear Zindagi (Directed by Gauri Shinde) said the right thing, ‘At times, we need to just let our parents be. It’s okay if they make mistakes. It’s normal like all of us.’ Sometimes we need to think of them as humans and not just parents bound with responsibilities. This makes things a bit simpler to comprehend. Expecting them to perfect is a thought traveled too far.
There is a very thought-provoking dialogue from the movie Angrezi Medium – it’s ok that you go behind your dreams and learn to be independent after 18, but come back after that no!
Until 18 we look after you, take care of you and then you leave and never want to come back, what sense does that make?’ Our zest for independence, making a life of our own has consumed our consideration for our parents’ happiness. We walk out of the door never wanting to return while the truth is that the door is kept always open expecting your return.
To have parents who support your dreams regardless of the boundaries and financial incapabilities is truly a silver lining. Rameshan (Nivin Pauly) from 1983(2014, Malayalam) was a representation of that selfless parent love. So were Aditi(Priyanka Chopra) and Niren Chaudhary (Farhan Akhtar) from The Sky is Pink. They didn’t have a dream of their own. All that they dreamt of and strived was for the fulfillment of their kid’s desires. The reserved a portion of their life just for that.
Chris Gardner from The Pursuit of Happyness was a homeless parent who never let his son suffer from the difficulties that he was facing. That’s exactly what every parent wants, that their children never have to suffer from the difficulties that they once faced or are facing.
Only when Sridevi in English Vinglish(2012) questions that ‘Am I a waste bin that you spit at me all bad things that come from your mouth’ we wear their hat to understand how it feels when we pointlessly lash out at our parents. In spite of all their effort, we often fail to acknowledge and appreciate our parents for their sacrifices and struggles.
Is it wrong if they expect a fraction of obligation from us for their selfless service? It’s not. Maybe this quarantine we can take some time to talk to them, spend some time with them and be grateful for all that they have been to us!
May be this lockdown is a gift in disguise to rebuild and reinvent the lost ties with family.